A Quintessentially British chap got rather confused on Twitter last night.
He believed what he wanted to believe.
How very Ibrox of him.
He had read the word “Hummel” associated with the basket of assets and he immediately thought it was about Mats Hummels the Bayern defender.
Oh dear…
In fact, there has been contact between the Sevco High Command and the sportswear company.
If it all sounds very business-like and planned out then you haven’t been paying attention.
An Ibrox insider told me this evening that the Hummel deal ,if it does go through, is an indication of the weak bargaining position of the six-year-old club.
Firstly the Blue Room chaps wanted Puma to stay with them.
They weren’t asking for much.
Indeed Sevco were willing to have the same strips and bonuses only due on sales if they exceeded a target set by the German giant.
Then the Quintessentially British chaps contacted every other major kit supplier on Monday.
That’s THIS week!
Zip.
Nothing.
Then they approached the second division outfits.
Hummel were the only folk to get back to them.
For the avoidance of doubt, if this goes through, there will be no signing on bonuses, no upfront royalties.
The only money that they get will be based on what is sold.
Moreover, my guy says it is approximately only 50% of the PUMA deal.
Remember General Ashley and those tanks?
Well, I’m told that he has communicated some potentially very bad news to the Sevco High Command.
Big Mike has intimated that he may not do the superstores for them next season.
My information is that this sent the Blue Room brethren into meltdown.
For the avoidance of doubt, the basket of assets has no infrastructure to run a merchandising operation.
Moreover, if Ashley goes through with this it would entail that he would have to be paid for all of the remaining stock.
As well as that, all of the staff he currently employs would have to revert back to the Holding Company Vehicle.
Of course, Sevco does not have the cash for any of this.
Then there is the small matter of storage for the classy merchandise.
The Holding Company Vehicle doesn’t have any unused space except for the trophy room at Ibrox.
Could this lead to the dumping of the Churchillian apparel?
I don’t know about you, but I don’t want Timmy Bear to be homeless.
One other thing:
Yesterday (Tuesday 17th April) three suppliers presented invoices to Argyle House demanding immediate payment by close of business this Friday.
My understanding is that these creditors are one step away from issuing proceedings.
Now, I really do have to go back down those damn word mines…
Slán go foill
Still beggars belief the degree of (or complete absence of) understanding that the ‘billys’ have for their clubs financial position.
Genuinely believing that they would be able to buy, pay and in particular register any interest from , a player like Hummels speaks volumes about their blinkered vision and refusal to recognise NOT being a big club!
I heard some deluded bear on radio snyde this week talking about Sean Dysche being IBrokes bound (45k a week S Dysche that is), and they are still talking about DeBoer and other ex Gers stars who wouldn’t wish to turn up for a LEGNEDS game never mind have to work there.
There IS no cure!
Ah ha
Your wrong Phil according to Rangers site Hummel was best
of 10 tenders.
Hmmm who to believe.
Enter negotiation son say Tuesday, and a joint press release on the Friday I don’t think so
Had a good old laugh at wee Coco trying to stick up for Wallace regarding the chaos from Sunday. The wee thicko put it out there Wallace stood up for the club when they where in the lower leagues even though EPL teams wanted him but Wallace turned them down to be at Klan Klub .Funny enough wee Coco did not say what EPL teams it was .Ah wee Coco been sharing the alcohol and smoking them funny fags again with the mad Booze Jockey bomber Brown I think .
No outlets to sell the kit..? I can see them being flogged from the back of a flatbed trailer like a guy in the Barras flogging his towels, throwing them over heads to the first one with a hand up. Be like Black friday every second Saturday.
Rrrers yer hummul taps, 2 fur a tennur… Tobacco… viagra.
I just had conversation with a deluded fan who claims Hummel are offering £4 million a season.
Totally and utterly mental
Phil – you worry about Sevco too much… I’m sure everything will be hunky dory, won’t it??
I’m sure Poundland will step in at the last minute with a merchandising deal.
Sorry Phil? A confused bear you say? Do you really expect us to believe such a creature exists? Dear god it really does sum up their intellect.
Ah wee Coco at ibrox noise shouting his mouth off the other day for big name manager for the huns .Here is his comedy gold moment for Thursday. He has let it be known Robbie Neilson is interested in rangers job. And wee Coco is all for this a think wee Coco sits with a bottle of Buckie and a big smoke one of those funny fags and then starts to write his pish .
Another mad Benny on radio snyde on Wednesday saying he is glad the Chisler told the spivs where to go when he got control of the club .This mad James Hunt then goes on to say but now King is running the club into the ground he doesn’t know where to go now .So praises the Chisler for saving the club but then is having a go for running it into the ground .A don’t think even fellow Bennys can keep up with each other for the contradictions they put out there from one and other .But hey wee Coco and Halloween Houston will spin some nonsense about catholics and the colour green that should keep the Klan happy for a few days .
Phil, I feel I have to say this to you ! My son is doing his Highers at the moment. Will both of you stop fucking about and finish that bloody manuscript!
A perfect storm.
So a mad Benny thought they had signed Matt Hummels I was at a quiz night here in Lanzarote on Thursday night and one of the Bennys entered the quiz .The question who was the first black player to captain England this daft James Hunt shouted out Paul Gascoigne oh how people laughed at him. And he did not stop there he answered even more like that you could hear people saying what thicko .He did not realise that people where laughing at him for being thick as he thought he was being funny .Definitely a follow the bouncing ball Benny all day long .
And now the fight is really on get your fake news here in the Daily Rectum from the guy that brought you the Poundland billionaire .He has been told by Frank Cannon (Jim Traynor )get the message out there and clear miller &Wallace of any blame .It’s now Thursday and we only learn of it now they had nothing to do with Murty attack in the dressing room .Ah a few days to get the story together and fake news it big time .If they had nothing to do with it why not do the story first thing Monday morning with a so called journalist. Now it’s out there other players are backing these 2 arseholes for their shenanigans which they both have previous for .As for being a true Pro don’t make me laugh theye got gubbed by radio Luxembourg ametuers where no Progress was made and did Wallace speak to the fans after the game no way .He sent out Young Rossiter to face the music and do his dirty work for him that’s the true class of this guy .
You owe me an apology, Phil. Do you have any idea how hard it is to go to sleep pissing myself laughing every night?
One mad Benny was on follow follow the other day giving it nothing to worry about it will all blow over in a few weeks time we will have our top class manager in place and the top signings will be done .Oh dear that sounds like it may well have been wee Coco sharing a bottle of Buckie with mad bomber Brown the booze jockey.
Chickens, roost,home, coming and to.
Rearrange these words to form a well known saying.
Brilliant stuff – I’m still surfing on a wave of happiness since Sunday. Your blog keeps me surfing.
Hi Phil,
Don’t get lost down those word mines.
It looks as if the roof is about to cave in
over at Sevco and I would not want you
to miss that!!
Phil’s been at the word mines again: This is mines from 2012, this is mines from 2013, 14, 15, 16 ….etc.
You are different class Phil.
HH
One Bear posted that the Hummel deal is £15 Million up front plus £4 Million a year.
Top stuff again Phil and I hope you win the football blogging awards to complete a memorable grand slam . The fall out from Sunday is still keeping the skies over ibrokes grey but was hearing earlier on of an almighty rammy when the team was announced hence why they were more shite than usual , apparently Miller wasn’t happy about being a sub and Wallace declared himself still injured despite the medical people saying differently . Their rabid bigotous fan’s however believe the fault lies squarely at young master Murts and some of the bile aimed at him is scandalous . Loved the Hummel’s bit tho , feckin fans must have thought Christmas has come early , would love to have seen his face when he realised he’d fucked . Yet more lost revenue and Big Mike has plenty of payback up his sleeve for the clusterfuck . Take it easy amigo ???????
Excellent, Phil…..HH
Ooft!
Imploding right enough…
Happy for this to continue ?
Now I’m pretty sure 100’s if not 1,000’s of fans have emailed UEFA regards the cash,or lack of it, at greyskull. So why hasn’t UEFA moved their arses and investigated ?
Why ? Why ? Why haven’t they ?
Anyone ?
If Sevco did sign Mats Hummel — current value £54 million — they would need £4 million above Glib’s promised — stay with me here — £50 million from the wean’s piggy bank.
A storage difficulty No Problem!!!! they can always use the big empty space at the middle of Ibrox with only 2 home games left and it being empty from 6/5/18 onward a couple of poly bags should be able to cover their potential sales.
Keep up the good work Phil.
Aww bless them! ?. HH
So it’s not £15m up front then after all…from a company with a £70m annual turnover??? Oh dear.
Are you sure its Hummel, after the Sunday humping, Pummel would be more apt for such an outfit .For all those on followfollow and other wee hate boards who have been doing mock up tops with Adidas and Nike logos emblazoned, looks like its going to be the cheap seats for them, and to think they believed that their mighty club had been the ones to see Puma off the premises.
Phil – the good news keeps coming lá i ndiaidh lae! Great work again. Maith thú – the hungry 90s are a distant memory. Míle buíochas!
And I thought this week couldn’t get any better. Cheers Phil. H.H.