How Britain became the Sevco of Europe

Remarkably there is an organisation that makes the Sevco High Command look like a centre of excellence:

The British government.

Yesterday was a rather special clusterfuck.

At this point, I wouldn’t be surprised if Malcolm Tucker followed Theresa May into an elevator to harshly compare her to a coffee machine.

Armando Iannucci’s wonderfully horrible creation coined the immortal term that appears terribly apposite apropos Brexit:


The European Union and the 27 member states are looking on in head-shaking disbelief.

No doubt some of the major players on the continent are rehearsing the question that I constantly asked myself in my undergraduate days and it is this:

How the fuck did this lot have an empire?

The creation and maintenance of the first truly global imperium must have taken a high level of competence.

Of course, that was back in the day.

As a child of the 1950s, I grew up amid the collapsing scenery of the British Empire.

Even after the Suez alarm call the UK still had a sizeable footprint on the world stage.

Not anymore though.

Alas, Britain has become the Sevco of Europe.

An NUJ colleague who works at Brussels has been telling me over the last year the extent to which the Brits are turning up poorly prepared to the Brexit negotiations.

Across the table, the Eurocrats have a mastery of fine detail.

Two nights ago I received a text from a senior member of the Irish government.

We have known each other for over twenty years.

I think it is fair to say that his mood was upbeat regarding the prospect of a deal on the Border with the UK government.

The following morning (yesterday) all of the major players in Brussels thought they had a deal with the UK on the Irish border question.

Here Philippe Lamberts MEP explains to a journalist the outline of the deal.

Later yesterday Prime Minister May was having a working lunch with Jean-Claude Juncker, the President of the European Commission.

It was all in place, but then she had to leave the table because Arlene Foster, the former First Minister of Northern Ireland had held a hastily arranged presser at Stormont.

Theresa spoke to the DUP leader and the deal was off.

Was this deal a surprise to Arlene?

The fatal assumption made by those bright folk in Brussels was to assume that Theresa May knows what she is doing.

Conspiracy theorists will believe that this was all some Machiavellian sequencing to wrong-foot those pesky continentals and Paddy.

Sadly, the truth is much more likely to be prosaic.

The EU task force, representing the collective interests of the 27 member states of the European Union is negotiating with incompetents.

Last night my buddy in Government Buildings was aghast at what had transpired over the day.

He couldn’t believe the level of incompetence on the Brit side of things.

At this stage, I wouldn’t trust this British government to handle an approach to Aberdeen for Derek McInnes…

40 thoughts on “How Britain became the Sevco of Europe”

  1. Every time the weak and woeful May speaks I am reminded of a corncrake. She is the most stupid Prime Minister Britain’s ever had. Brexit will destroy England. Keep it up Theresa, the comedy is compelling.

  2. This guy thinks yer NI loyalist/unionist “will have everything to win by that”. In their best interest that relationships with Ireland continue as under GFI.
    Afraid he’s deluded if he thinks he understands DUP/loyalist feelings on this.

  3. JT . Phil lives in a free country because that freedom was fought for , and wrestled from the arms of a colonial brit government .
    Irish men and women ,earned that freedom ,with blood and tears.
    Letting the past rest , Ireland still has the brit attack dog on it’s soil ,there is no rest. As witnessed by the latest from the boot wi a flute.
    Get fkn real.

  4. An unfortunate but predictably biased offering from yourself on the disappointing state of affairs yesterday.

    I think it’s clear to all that the post general election several week period of negotiating the DUP deal regarding “Confidence and Supply” has crashed and burned as the DUP are delivering neither to the Theresa May Government.

    Theresa should be withholding her billions for NI at this point. And all because DUP don’t want NI to be a special case (with benefits) to the rest of the UK.

    The EU didn’t need to go the extra mile to keep an open border, which is a dangerous precedent for Europe. But they did and teeny weeny DUP have defecated on it.

    So rather than blaming the UK government let’s lay the blame squarely with the Irish. For it is Irish people in the north scuttling the deal not London.

  5. Remember who bailed out Ireland in 2009?

    Ireland is now a EU colony run for benefit of German bond holders. Your children and grandchildren will pay for the property bubble for decades.
    Enjoy swimming in the puddle of anti-British bigotry. The country that could destroy your economy by buying Argentine beef, New Zealand lamb. For starters.

  6. Do any the posters here actually live in England?

    Can you see what its become?

    Millions flock to the UK for a better life only to end up as fodder for the bankers and corporatioms, forcing down wages, living standards. Everything south of Birmingham is at breaking point, trains, hospitals, GP’S. Roads, schools, housing. Its fine and dandy if your rich but for the rest of us its become a living hell, a time bomb waiting to exploded.

    The people who want BrExit stopped really haven’t thought of the consequences of ignoring the only real Democratic vote in British history nor the consequences of shoe horning 5 million turks into the south of England.

    One thing is clear…the MPs care not for democracy and a suistanable Britain but look to appease their masters and do their bidding.

    The £ has been doomed since 2007…prices ate going up not because of BrExit but because if the actions of the bankers. QE they call it, Money printing or theft in reality. This and the Low interest rated have desyroyed the UK, BrExit or not a collapse was always inevitable. The bankers do not want BrExit…so there will be no BrExit…if a government being controlled by men who magic money out if thin air to enslave people via debt doesn’t scare you then you really haven’t thought it threw.

    England is finished whatever course the politicians choose.

    Rejoice, the witch is dead.

  7. The Sevco parallel is compelling in both directions.

    As with Theresa May’s government, the Ibrox board are currently the victims of a basic credibility gap. Why has it taken them so long to get their act together… what is their gameplan… what are they playing at? Everyone assumes they are at it – they must be up to something – because the actual situation is a reality of such staggering incompetence that quite simply no-one can credit it.

    In the case of Sevco, the current rather odd situation is, I believe, explained as follows.

    The board (as a majority at least) *do* want McInnes and are actively trying to do the deal. Problem is, in light of the ongoing financial situation at Ibrox, Aberdeen would require the full release clause figure for DMI – and any staff he takes with him – paid in full prior to anyone leaving.

    Further problem is, the Aberdeen board don’t trust them – King in particular – and don’t want to find themselves in a situation where McInnes’ position at the club has already been made untenable, having agreed a personal deal with Rangers, and pressure is then put on Aberdeen to do an instalment deal. Hence they are demanding not just an agreement up front – but crucially *proof of funds* – before formal talks with DMI take place.

    Sevco have not provided proof of funds. McInnes is perplexed – because the informal, indirect communications which have taken place have included assurances of generous funds available for rebuilding. So, naturally, he assumes they must have the money, but are stalling for some undisclosed reason – probably to destabilise Aberdeen.

    What he doesn’t realise is, the real reason they have not yet provided proof of funds is a far simpler one. They genuinely *don’t have* them. Oh dear oh dear. Dave had assumed one of the board members would eventually cave and front up the cash. But Dave was wrong. Oh why is life so complex and so difficult? ; )

    1. As an Irishman with Republican leanings,could I point you to to check out the debt levels of the 27 fantastically run countries in the EU in the first quarter of 2017.Britain,the Sevco of Europe? Did the British taxpayer not pay around 14 billion to bail out Ireland,through the Royal Bank and Lloyds banking group a few years back? I have no love of the British,particularly concerning foreign warmongering but facts are facts.Don’t lower standards to MSM levels,please…..

  8. Excellent article, as always, Phil! To answer your question as to how this lot ever had an empire – the answer is simple! They picked on nations with little or no military might, went in, took over, oppressed the indigenous peoples and treated them like slaves. Oh and they had a roaring trade going in selling these slaves to others!
    As for Brexit,as one of the other comments said if they were to re-run that referendum now I think the result would be vrry different, now that people see the shambles of these negotiations! Arlene & co may paint themselves into a corner here! They may threaten to bring down the government (it’s on borrowed time now anyway) but Theresa might say feck it let’s go for a border poll- wouldn’t that be fun? ??

  9. I voted to remain but now I can’t wait to leave. I have grown to despise the EU institution more than successive UK governments. The thing is, I said at the time of the referendum that the government will not go through with Brexit. Nothing I have seen so far has changed my mind.

    1. Well that’s obviously not right because all the media – press, tv, news, radio, and sites that choose the news you see like ‘google news’ etc, and all the academics offered a platform in the media and all the students and the donkey jacket wearing “workers” on the picket lines everywhere with their ‘socialist worker’ placards have all stated very clearly that everyone who voted Leave regrets it and would vote Remain tomorrow if they just could. That they see the error of their ways and realise that they are racists, bigots and facists, hoodwinked by the Tories into voting the wrong way, and that the Remainers, and Labour, are really, really decent, honest, non-racist, non-facist people who are by definition always right.

      So, sorry SHP you must be wrong on this one. If you have any doubt about it go and read a newspaper.

      Oh and btw, you’re not allowed to support Celtic either. You must be a Hun etc

  10. They are blindfold in a negotiating maze that keeps closing and altering the paths of exit, shifting it’s boundaries and preventing escape, they are ill prepared, inept, and most of all confused as to their final destination, a nice soft Brexit with the E.U. giving in to their wishes……………but they refuse to admit they are driven by the hardliners of the Brexiteers who are still living in the past with the “glorious British Empire” attitude towards others, which will force them to walk away without agreements, as they are delighted with the shambles taking place, probably they are responsible for it.

  11. As soon as the news broke about the £2 billion bribe to the bigoted DUP for support in Westminster…
    The country should have been up in arms…and taken to the streets in protest.
    An NHS that’s crippled…A housing sector that’s a national disgrace…Severe infrastructure problems everywhere…Mental Health issues being ignored…are just some of the areas needing financial assistance…..NOW !!
    Will they get what they need…??…Will they feck….
    Getting Bills through Parliament is more important than people’s lives or their environment.
    But you know what…?
    We muttered in the pubs and in our homes about how disgraceful this tawdry deal was….
    But that was it…
    So maybe we’ve got what we deserve.
    As for how GB got an Empire…
    The Butcher’s Apron tells you all you need to know.

    1. To quote Big Billy Connolly, ‘Don’t vote, you’ll just encourage them!’

      To quote myself, ‘The Empire never ended, they just stopped sharing the money and keep it for themselves.’

      The country that masquerades as ‘The U.K.’, but with C is really only The City of London is second only to The Vatican in the pecking order of the Freemasonic societal pyramid of control & wealth, closely followed by the 3rd sole sovereign state in this malignant triumvirate, Washington DC (which was itself formerly called Rome …)

      Check it out.

      Britain still owns America and The Vatican owns the lot, while the Jesuit Order sits in the background pretending to have nothing to do with any of it.

      This stuff really is a genuine conspiracy, Phil, but there’s nothing to do with ‘theory’ in any of it, this stuff can be checked out with a couple of clicks of a mouse and I can assure you, I didn’t believe it at first either but there it is, in plain black & white, like evy other good Masonic production, standing all proud of itself and its accomplishments.

      And if you still don’t believe me, ask yourself this:

      Who would give up all their stolen goods having spent over a thousand years in the killing for it ..?

    2. So true Mike, I was just talking about this today to a work mate, the DUP are now running the UK!!!!
      The bribe money could have been spent on more operations and care within the NHS, it is a bloody disgrace that May and her cohorts got away with this act, I’m not big on law, but surely this could have been challenged somehow by the other political parties, but then again the Ibrox brethren have been getting away with this sort of Kleptocracy for years.

      For god’s sake who in there right mind in Scotland would vote Tory, except HUNS!!!!!

  12. The answer is fairly obvious to me:
    1) Form a Britain Holding Company
    2) Leave Europe

    If it doesn’t work out:
    3) Abandon said Holding Company
    4) Move all divorce bill debt to said Holding Company
    5) Call ourselves ‘The Germany’
    6) Claim victory in WWI & II
    7) Carry on as if nothing has happened

    1. I tend to keep schtum regarding politics but,…..
      That’s an excellent summation of an all too familiar scenario,however,they aren’t run by the sfa.
      You’d need the help a compliant ‘authority’ to grease the wheels of that unlikely scam,funny though.

      Football in CP tonight was not what We All had hoped for,but the job was done although we missed a bonus of £1.4m(approximately)for the win tonight,that would have been most welcome,especially with the transfer window approaching.

      Thanks Phil?☮️??

  13. Your hatred of the UK government detracts from your excellent work with regard Sevco.
    You live in a free country , let the past rest.

  14. From an Arab on twitter last night

    All this talk of a hard Brexit or a soft Brexit when the reality it we’re looking at a Staunch Brexit

  15. I have this image of the future, a bit like the “Pick me, pick me” donkey moment in Shrek.
    It’s when Brexit Britain attends Global trade talks in the future and Mays successor is jumping up and down trying to get noticed, trying to strike a deal, trying to get involved in a deal.

    Hello hello remember us, Great Britain and by jolly we were Great, sixty million of us you know and we are open…………eh where do you think your off to old bean ?

    Sorry 700 million over there, call me , better yet I’ll call you ….tally ho and all that.

    Hello hello remember us, Great Britain…….

  16. Phil, you asked in your post: “How the fuck did this lot have an Empire?”

    I always unerstood that there was a well-established management process for running the British Empire – the English decided what was to be done, whereupon the Scots made damned sure, the Irish and Welsh did the exact opposite to what the English wanted.

    This can no longer work, because the English have succeeded in totally pissing-off Jock, Paddy and Dai, so, they are having to do things their way – hence the clusterfuck we are currently watching.

  17. Looks like this Tory Government sees Brexit as an opportunity to ditch the Devolved Parliament of the 6 N.I Counties as part of the UK, I wonder how long before a Border Poll is suggested to resolve the issue, well the majority did vote to remain in the E.U……………….looks like the British Crown’s Government has made the first step to a United Ireland, as you cannot have one foot in the UK and one in the E.U.
    Arleen and the DUP now know they are not and never were a main player in the Border Question, they virtually $hat themselves yesterday at the news a deal was agreed where they would have had no say in any future Border Poll for the unification of Ireland.

  18. The ipsi dixit of the hardline Brexiteers from day one has been that no deal is better than a bad deal. They have not recognised that no deal means the distinct (though perhaps unlikely) chance that every airplane in Britain except those flying to North America could be grounded as they would not have permission to enter EU airspace.

    The EU holds all the cards in these negotiations. It takes a special level of stupidity on the UK’s part not to realise that. But no more stupid than you have to be to get into bed with the hate-filled zealots of the DUP. Omnishambles is correct. Here’s hoping sense eventually prevails.

  19. Its been obvious since before the vote that no one, especially the Government, had any idea what was coming down the pike if the vote was to leave the EU.
    The threat to jobs, price inflation, pound dropping against the Euro, its all going pear shape.
    If there was another referendum there would be a massive turnaround in the vote with only little Englanders and right wing thinkers sticking with Brexit.

  20. There was no need to undertake a referendum in the first place. It was solely to appease a section of the “little England Party”, which sadly is still in government, albeit with the support of some bigots in the North of Ireland.
    Using the term competence and Theresa May’s governance in the same sentence is wholly inappropriate. She was an incompetent when acting as Home Secretary and is clearly out of her depth in her present role.
    As you correctly stated, Phil, how the blazes did this mob have an empire?

  21. That’s what happens when you have a weak and woeful Prime Minister who has sold her soul to a she-devil in a desperate bid to stay in power and an ill-prepared, grinning loon of a Brexit Minister who’s out of his depth when faced with hardened professional negotiaters in Brussels.

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