Pain plotting 2

Last night Sevco were battered at Tynecastle.

The entire omnishambles could have been scripted to underline the main thrust of my piece yesterday.

It was a screenplay that didn’t spare on the schadenfreude.

Long before the final whistle, most of the visiting fans had shown the Dunkirk Spirit.

As regular readers here will be aware, there was a high-Level campaign against Ian Cathro when he was hired by Hearts.

The 4-1 thumping was a smooth hipster response, and the experiment is clearly starting to yield positive results.

The Tynecastle side was in cruise control halfway through the second period despite the fact that Sevco had the Six Million Pound Man in midfield.

Now if the Engine Room Subsidiary actually had a player of that quality, like Scott Sinclair, then it could have tipped the balance.

Emerging from the transfer window Sevco heavily rely on to veterans and neither Clint Hill nor Kenney Miller has so far been offered new deals for next season.

If any of The People believe that failure to re-sign these guys is anything to do with a lack of money, then I can’t help them.

Actually, no one can.

Any new investor in the Holding Company Vehicle must be prepared to give away tens of millions of pounds before they employ one new footballer for Sevco.

It is vital to buy out Ashley and start with a new retail deal.

It still has six years to run and will cost £4m per annum of that notice period.

The stadium could require £20m spent on it and then also add in the rental cost of acquiring another venue while the work in ongoing.

Only then could money go into the squad.

Some of the ‘Onerous Contracts’ mentioned by Graham Wallace in the spring of 2014 haven’t gone away you know.

Remember that pesky £278k per month?

I returned to the source of that scoop this week.

He said to me that if someone were able to drill down into the “other operating expenses”, then they might well find it there.

Meanwhile Celtic played the second strongest team in the country.

The Champions took to the field with no recognised striker and four key players missing.

It wasn’t winning ugly, far from it, but it was a highly professional 1-0 victory.

Once more the contrast between the biggest club in Scotland and Sevco is an exercise in cruelty.

During the last transfer window, Celtic was willing to go to £9m for one player while rebuffing substantial offers for the likes of Craig Gordon and Kieran Tierney.

Only in the rarefied atmosphere of the sports desks was this season ever going to be a contest between the Parkhead club and the Engine Room Subsidiary.

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If I didn’t know better, I would think that these chaps were on drugs when they came up with this shite.

Of course, The People lapped it up at the time.

They believed this pish.

Some hallucinogenic substances they were reading convinced them that they were “going for 55”.

There’s some bad shit out on the street man.

I’m telling ya!

If symptoms persist then, please consult your dealer.

For the avoidance of doubt, their prescient tip for the player of the year is still owed a couple of hefty tranches from Sevco.

Once he is paid in full, I suspect Monsieur Barton to be more forthcoming as there was no confidentiality agreement.

That should be entertaining.

We’ve all seen this zombie movie several times since the premiere of Sevco in 2012.

The thing is the production values just aren’t what they used to be at the Ibrox studios.

In fairness, the cast of thousands are still there, but they’re just extras milling around without any direction.

Moreover, there are certainly no stars on the lot.

The reality is that their beloved four-year-old institution is now in a dogfight for second place.

That really is the height of their ambitions.

Simply the second best.

That’s actually the best that FC Begbie can expect for a long time ahead.

It’s enough to get you back on heroin…

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