As Good As it Gets FC

An excellent source told me today about an interesting meet-and-greet on Sunday night at the stadium John Brown used to play for.

In the aftermath of the heroic victory against Motherwell, a select group of hacks and pundits were invited back to the Blue Room.

I’m told that a few of them were in a mood to greet by the end of the meeting.

For the avoidance of doubt, I have the names of the attendees.

The reason for this quintessentially British conclave was to get the succulent ones on message.

Dear reader, this is the dignified diktat that was conveyed to that meeting of the mediocre.

Firstly, the order was to forget about spouting forth about Clement’s position being untenable.

Quite simply we cannot afford to sack him.

Also, they were told to emphasise the positive aspects of Philippe’s CV, such as his winning titles in other leagues.

As for the overall financial situation, the assembled crowd was informed that next year’s figures could be considerably worse due to no Champions League participation.

As some of the Fitba Fourth estate  were mournfully looking down at their brogues, a member of the Sevco High Command stated the inconvenient truth:

“This might be as good as it gets for a long while”.

It was then pointed out that much of this excrement exhibition could be laid at the door of one David Cunnigham King.

Indeed, it was speculated that they might now be at break-even point if it had not been for all the legal own goals.

Surprisingly, when this was mentioned, apparently, not a single hack raised a glass to the basket of assets for winning the coveted Free From Litigation Cup.

Disappointing…

Tonight, the UEFA Champions League anthem will, once more, be played at the biggest club stadium in Scotland.

Some of the same hacks who were in the Blue Room last Sunday might be in Paradise as the Hoops take on RB Leipzig.

Perhaps these words from one of the Sevco High Command might still be troubling them greatly.

“As good as it gets”.

Simply the second best.

Although, in fairness, Aberdeen might have something to say about that this season.

However, the Ibrox klanbase are now on another journey, one of acceptance as to their place in the natural order of things.

What they haven’t accepted is that the long road to achieving their imagined position of supremacism was previously undertaken by Sisyphus.

 

22 thoughts on “As Good As it Gets FC”

  1. The hacks will always print something to keep the stiff upper lip for the average hun but it’s all smoke and mirrors diverting from the truth

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  2. Every day is indeed a school day, but I do have to say it’s all Greek to me, the game was magic though and every man played their part the players,subs, manager,and most of all the fans ….I just hope that fool who ran into the park doesn’t have any detrimental effect on anything.

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    • He was a young boy, probably around 12 years old, UEFA have been known to slam clubs for less. I indeed await the €20,000 fine coming through the letter box at Celtic Park

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  3. Though not in keeping with tonight’s classical theme, the article’s image strongly reminds me of the 1980s “McEwans Lager – Alive & Kicking” series of adverts, which is ironic as due to a series of poor business decisions by its various parent companies McEwans as a brand is almost as dead as their ‘prestige football partner’ of the same period….

    Not so much ‘Alive & Kicking’ as ‘Deid & Decomposing’.

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  4. Please remember whilst tonight’s performance and subsequent result were fully justified, one swallow does not make a summer. The indicators suggest that espanyolification is underway but I believe it will be a slow and painful process for those who fill the seats of the stadium Ian Redford once played in. Have patience and the new Fourth Lanark, without Fourth Estate interference, will shortly appear playing at the Glasgow Greeen.

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  5. Clement was right when he said that Rangers were legendary. How else to explain a club who celebrated their 150th birthday having been formed in 2012?

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  6. Tonight’s Celtic performance was up there with the best I’ve seen in Europe from Celtic over the last 50 odd years.
    Well done Brendan and the bhoys, that was terrific.

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    • I couldn’t agree more, it was composed, slick and on three or four occasions it was like pinball. This group of players are now a unit and getting stronger. One thing that’s stood out for me was how dynamic we were at playing out. Even balls that were played to positions where the recipient was immediately under pressure were dealt with calmly by players moving repeatedly and swiftly to give an out ball. It was never this even when Rodgers was here the last time. There is an intelligence and understanding there now. What a night.

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  7. Jeezo, Phil.

    I eagerly jump on to your latest blog for more orc-induced hilarity – only to find myself boning up on my Greek Mythology!

    Take from Wikipedia:

    “In Greek mythology, Sisyphus or Sisyphos was the founder and king of Ephyra. He was a devious tyrant who killed visitors to show off his power. This violation of the sacred hospitality tradition greatly angered the gods. They punished him for trickery of others, including his cheating death twice”

    Every day is a school day.

    Cheers Phil!

    Reply
    • Ye canny beat the Ancient Classics: still very relevant 2-3 thousand years later.

      I’m thinking that Sisyphus is maybe not the most accurate – initial – comparison

      to sevco?

      I’d compare the club to Epimetheus, myself!

      And, as ever, hubris ALWAYS gets you in the end. 🙂

      Reply

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