The current manager of Sevco cannot directly approach a senior player in his squad on a matter of concern.
Instead, intermediaries have to be deployed.
It goes like this; Jonatan Lillebror Johansson takes a message from Senhor Pedro Miguel Faria Caixinha to the Serious Professional.
He then goes and has a Quintessentially British sit down with a senior person in the Sevco Squad.
A recent dignified conclave involved the Senior Professional communicating Pedro’s request for there to be only one officially approved social media account for the squad.
The veteran player sent a message back through the labyrinthine communication channels to his esteemed manager.
Apparently, the reply was that the Portuguese Guardiola should go and have sexual congress with himself.
As I have reported here, it is it is the consensus among the Sevco High Command that Pedro isn’t the guy.
However, they simply can’t afford to sack him and his backroom team.
If they did, then the issue is that Pedro has brought in NINE players and he has a connection with EIGHT of them.
The next item of disharmony might be when the “Poundshop Mourinho” makes Bruno Alves his captain.
I’m sure the WhatsApp Group moderator will be Churchillian about that elevation.