Really, guys, I could do with some downtime this summer.
Don’t get me wrong, covering the Sevco shitshow is great fun, and the local media still seem determined to look the other way.
I realise that if I, as a named member of the NUJ, don’t do this stuff, then it won’t be done at all and that troubles me.
However, there are limits.
Today, I spent an enjoyable hour putting together some garden furniture.
For the avoidance of doubt, I couldn’t have achieved my total victory over that wooden Meccano set without the loving assistance of the bean chéile.
All done, no bits left over and good to go.
Then, Sevco struck!
My plans for sitting out on a summer evening here in Dún na nGall were fecked by the latest episode of that darkly hilarious epic.
Until today, I didn’t know that the Transcendental Chairman was also a project manager.
However, if you have a cunning plan to save five per cent on the cost of building materials from the Far East, you will have to face our old friend geography.
Now that discounted Chinese steel has been diverted for Putin’s tanks- he’s an excellent customer, you know.
Moreover, the last time there were this many problems in the Suez Canal area was when President Eisenhower put the Brits into administration in 1956!
Foregoing any notions of sitting out in a beautiful evening under an Irish sky, I contacted a well-placed Ibrox source who had more to share.
I was told that Billy the Builder had, in his dignified excavations, uncovered more problems with the existing fracture.
At a stroke, this wipes out any potential savings on materials sourced in Asia.
This capital expenditure on the stadium that John Brown played for will be smiled upon by UEFA as an FSR offset.
However, in the world of cash flow, what does this excrement exhibition do to dear Philippe’s squad rebuilding budget?
I doubt that any of the Stenography Corps will ask him.
When the news broke, Hoops fans on social media weren’t slow to have a snigger at their nativist neighbours.
So far, this one is my favourite.
Now, I hope that I get out in the garden tomorrow!
So please, Sevco, take a break.
Please…
Why don’t we let them play at Celtic Park for a nominal fee, enough to cover our expenses, but without fans, since they couldn’t be trusted not to trash the place. Or better, because we couldn’t, “Guarantee their safety!”
The SRU will be looking for a good ‘whack of cash’ for the renting out of MURRAYFIELD & there will be substantial travel costs involved for fans for approximately 6 fixtures.
Does anyone know the name of the company doing the Ibrox work? Has anyone bothered to ask them what the problem is?
Has the Chinese face painter been paid ?
Surely the sensible thing is just to use the other three stands for a few games, the cost for hire of another stadium and loss of match day revenue is surely more than the loss of the one stand of tickets, might still be able to use the lower section too with appropriate safety considerations, so just a few thousand seats !?
Does the Loving Cup tour?
Maybe the Excavations uncovered “Ra Deeds”. If so Bomber Brown should be informed so he can hot footed to the stadium he played for so he can get someone to read them out to him.
If the wongadome won’t be ready for the start of the season, it will cost Sevco a lot more than the higher repair bill. They’ll have to pay to use another stadium, compensate season ticket holders (aye, right!), give up advertising and matchday revenue – hospitality, pie & bovril profits, etc.
Hampden at nominal brotherly rates is a solution.
Hampden has gigs this summer and the pitch will then be re-laid. Queens Park will be playing at Lesser Hampden until sometime in September.🤣
Is Hampden not out of use whilst the pitch is being redone?
Didn’t know the “unseen finial hand” could reach that far.
Good advert for post BREXIT global trading. Could they have ordered steel fabrication from a very honest, reliable supplier , tax aware entity , just along theM8 .who at one time had a relationship with this club. Bobby the Builder discovered artefacts while clearing the stand. Apparently the foundations were built on the remnants of an old Christian community and church(CATHOLIC). I’m told that blue/brown stuff hit the fan.
I enjoy these narratives of yours Phil.😎🤔🤣🤣☘️
By using foreign companies from Asia for their ‘ materials ‘ Phil , isn’t that a slap in the face to British firms who could also supply said goods ? TheRangers keep telling everyone that it is the quintessential British football clumpany ,steeped in all of Britishness , yet ignore British companies , therefore denying HMRC of vital tax monies …all round ! Where have I read that last part before …hmmnn ? Oh , it’ll come back to me !
I look forward to Dundee FC making a song and dance about this whilst requesting a five figure compensation sum.
As a Dundee supporter Ivan tell you they can ask to use Dens but they would have to pay for the pitch upgrade that has taken place and fines that they encouraged SPFL to slap on us.
As an aside did anyone see interview with Chris Jack on STV news – it looked like he was sitting in an Ibrox shrine and debased further (if possible) football journalism in Scotland.
I imagine too that those involved will want paid up front for materials and work involved given their history of financial woes and litigation
No doubt they’ll be looking to use Hampden……….for free.
Hail and Hail again!
There’s Pink concerts on at Hampden, I think they’ll need to go to the RFU in Edinburgh.
But it’s the building material suppliers’ fault. It’s always someone else’s fault and I suppose that this makes a welcome change from blaming referees, VAR and the SFA on their misfortunes. Rangers now need to find another ground in which to fulfil their home fixtures until Ibrox is fit for purpose. Maybe they should approach Dundee as I recall that they are very fond of the Dens Park pitch!
That’s the first time they’ve been knocked out of the Close Season Cup in round one by an own goal. A quick look at FF reveals a mass of in the know project managers and construction engineers who could see it all coming yet till yesterday had said nothing. Also a few hints that there are structural issues and asbestos problems. Hampden isn’t available and Murrayfield unlikely due to festival, tattoo and competing matches at Hibs and Hearts causing a policing nightmare. They could save their fans a few Bob and ask to groundshare at Linfield I suppose.
😂😂👌
Buy cheap buy twice 🤣
Does this mean they miss out on Aye Ready trophy ? 😪
Garden furniture Phil? Leave it. I’m needing you to be working on the follow up to the excellent Native Shore! The word mines await you mi amigo!
I’m obviously kidding – have a good and relaxed summer Phil, and get some ‘you’ time in. As the only journalist covering the ‘events’ at Ibrox openly, we need you rested to carry on the honest journalism from August – after Sevco win the close season cup (again) obviously!
Thanks for everything Phil. Please keep fighting the good fight.
Good to see the color co- ordinated the crane.
They do say Phil that you should never kick a dog when it’s down…..Ivrather fear yer stovin’ in the poor Mutts’ Ribs!