Pedro Day

Today one year ago today Senhor Pedro Miguel Faria Caixinha was…ahem…unveiled at Ibrox as the new manager of Sevco.

You can see the presser here.

He would be gone by the October.

If football is part of the entertainment business then this was a masterstroke.

Pedro’s reign of error provided great pleasure to thousands of football fans in Scotland.

Aberdeen fans, Celtic fans, Motherwell fans.

You get the idea.

Then in his one and only European campaign with Sevco he met with little Progrès.

The NHS in Scotland were stretched to the limit as sides were split due to uncontrollable laughter.

By then the Sevco High Command had bet the farm on Pedro getting them to the Group Stages of the Europa League.

The need for them to go to Close brothers for a heavily secured loan can be located in Pedro’s calamitous time at Ibrox.

In pressers, the likeable Portuguese spoofer was box office.

It was all about caravans, dogs and all manner of gobshitery.

His team on the pitch was even funnier.

One year ago today the stenographers were in raptures that Sevco had signed the new Mourinho.

There was breathless shite about “Tactical Periodisation”.

The Daily Radar even did a wee cartoon so that The People could follow what was happening.

Not since they told us about the billionaire Craig Whyte has the Stenography Corps got it so badly wrong about anything at Ibrox.

Pedro’s influence can still be felt at the stadium that John Brown played for.

When Moussa Dembélé effortlessly rolled Fábio Rafael Rodrigues Cardoso on Sunday the aged Bruno Alves (currently the highest paid player in Scotland) looked on helplessly.

It was this Caixinha central defensive pairing that saw out the match for Sevco.

The players that Pedro brought in from his home country and the Americas are on good deals and will be difficult to shift.

The Sevco High Command tried to do this in the January window, but they could only loan out Carlos Alberto Peña Rodríguez at a fraction of his bloated salary.

Those burdens on the wage bill continue to contribute to the cash flow crisis at Ibrox.

So on this day, we should remember him.

Muito obrigado!

52 thoughts on “Pedro Day”

  1. Morning folks anyone want a laugh have a read online at Gary Ralston in the rectum today . He has mentioned the word failed when talking about Celtic this guy is comedy gold . As he goes on to speak of rangers telling us that they can rely on King and his millions lol Gary where was he then when they had to go to pawn shop for some serious money . But hey season tickets need to be sold so put it out there King is still about with his millions if the club need anything no doubt the bennys will fall for it again again and again.

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  2. I do not know anything about Company Law and Directors obligations etc. but surely falsifying documentation when providing information to football authorities is fraudulent.

    Above all, any falsification leads to monetary gain. Playing in European competition etc. is guaranteed monetary gain.

    Football club/company, WE all know = same entity despite the pish..

    All companies in UK subject to same rules and regulations.

    SO if anyone is suspected to have been deliberately involved in fraudulent acts regarding Rangers admittance to European involvement in 2011, surely this is all beyond mere football authority governance?

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  3. Who and more importantly why has someone released the Alistair Johnston story to the media?
    The timing is not accidental as it’s UEFA licencing process time for next season.
    More to this than meets the eye.

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    • Surely the point is that until F&P he shouldn’t be chairman. What is the point of a process to ensure one is worthy of being appointed to a position of responsibility if one is allowed to conduct the role of chairman for almost a year before possibly being found ineligible. That is just crazy A lot of damage can be done in that period. Crazy!

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    • Joe

      When traces of journalism are detected near Scottish football, you know for certain that political manoeuvres are taking place. Who would benefit most from Dandy Ali’s discomfort?

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  4. The appointment of Pedro Caixhina was the most damaging event ever to visit Deadco since the demise of the oldco. Looking on as a Celtic fan one came to the conclusion that Deadco were set up for a fall by some outside agency. Baffling and incomprehensible come to mind. Long may this comedy continue, but not too long. Nobody would miss them.

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  5. Well that’s a belter. Alistair Johnston not yet given fit and proper status as the SFA is awaiting the Compliance Officer’s review of the 2011 UEFA fraudulent licence application.
    The clear inplication is that Johnston, as Oldco Chairman, when the application was made was fully aware of the unpaid, overdue Wee Tax Bill, but ticked the box declaring no taxes overdue nevertheless.
    Are we finally getting to the end game on Res 12 and unveiling those involved in perpetrating a serious fraud.
    Hopefully that is the case then we can go after those involved in the subsequent cover up.
    Why is it taking the Compliance Officer so long, 6 months plus now, to finalise his review?

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  6. Typical ‘Sevconomics’ practices going on at the moment with the contract renewals for Moral-less and Canny-Dae-Arse…

    Keeps the zombeez thinking they are getting investment in the right places and that they are a ‘big team’ . Absolutely no realisation that these contracts are worthless when it comes to the long term future of Rainjuurz. If the players actually prove to be worth anything they WILL be sold in the summer. The extension just gives Sevco a bit more leverage in any sale.

    More likely is them being ‘walked away’ when the club ‘go admin’ and the contracts effectively become void.

    You have to wonder if ANY of the players at IBrokes over the last 6 years have had any idea of what the finances are like!? Sometimes those closest to a precarious situation (financial or other) are the ones who fail to notice it, or care!

    Just another cynical attempt to secure ST money and keep up the ‘challenge coming’ pish.

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  7. Whilst there was a mixed response from Newco fans to EBT McLeish including 3 of their (loan players) in the recent squad announcement they made not have thought this through.
    With none of them being near a Scottish squad for a while surely the call up now will enhance their market value and will lead to their parent clubs squrezing some more cash from the Ibrox ST monies.
    Would be no surprise if such a clause was already in the loan agreement if Scotland came calling.

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  8. I see that the BBC Scotland website has an article titled,

    “Scottish football accused of sweeping sectarianism under the carpet”.

    James Dornan MSP…..

    “Secrecy is the way they run their business”.

    “I’ve seen them in action in committees in Parliament and they seem to think we have no right to question them. They believe secrecy is the way to hold power. This is Scottish football’s dirt secret and it’s tome Scottish football stepped up to the plate”.

    On Scottish football’s lack of action in dealing with “sectarian singing” at football matches…

    “I’d like to say I’m shocked by this, but I’m not in the slightest. The footballing authorities have proven that they are not willing to take it on”.

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  9. Phil I like your work I’ve been following you on and off for nearly 8 years – however I do feel that u are indulging in a bit of stenography yourself at times- to say Alves is the top paid player in Scotland is just plain wrong – both Scott Brown and Scott Sinclair and possibly 1 or 2 others at celtic and possibly at ibroke are paid more than the Portuguese “superstar” (sic)

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  10. I see the SFA and Scotland team have boycotted the Russian World Cup in advance – such vision and integrity 🙂

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  11. I’m hearing that large Caterpillar earthmovers have been seen approaching Hampden to grade to pitch to 1 in 10 so TheRangers can play downhill for both halves. No need to toss a coin at the start – it has Queenie on both sides and TheRangers have first choice.

    Ridiculous? Well, not nearly as ridiculous as what has already actually happened in Scottish Footballn so far.

    Nine digit tax evasion? I see no ships!

    Hundreds of matches voided by ineligible players including European competitios? Move alomng Timmy!

    Lying taciitly accepted to HMRC, SFA, UEFA, by Rangers, TheRangers, SPFL, SFA? Technicalities and discretion, you wouldn’t understand!

    Secret contracts between conflicted organisations: Rangers, Therangers, SFA, SFL, SPL, Five Way Agreement? Sssssssh!

    SMSM, including BBC Scotland, taking money under false pretences as journalists? It’s the Scottish way!

    Governance by conflicted individuals – allegiance clubs, EBTs, shares, allegiance to secret oaths and rituals? Trust your elders and betters sonny!

    Scam inquiries to cover areses: LNS, Whye/Green connections? Baffle the little people and do what you like!

    RRM in black making dishonest mistakes for decades. Corrupt clubs need corrupt officials to achieve parity!

    Fuck it, let’s make the pitch 1 in 8 and give TheRangers a five-a-side goal to defend.

    Scottish Football as a sport? That would be a nice idea!

    Scotland as a functioning, modern, liberal democracy? My hairy arse!

    Scotland as corrupt banana republic without the benefit of bananas and sunshine? That resonates with me!

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  12. Phil, obviously it’s your site, and a very good one at that. But why do you allow Scud Missile’s repeated updates regarding FF or Ibrox Noise etc? Anyone who wants to view these sites can do so without him. If I didn’t know better I’d say he’s a closet hun posting about their pages so your readers look “obsessed”.

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    • Just keeping (people )like you up to date with the huns and what they are saying . I think you maybe a closet hun as you are the only one to mention this when others have gone wit has the flow on it .

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  13. The cloud over Ibrox is rapidly darkening, but they’re still paying for PR which promises sunbeams. It is more likely that results against teams other than Celtic will eventually lead to another putsch, probably in the immediate wake of King’s retreat across the Limpopo. Administration, in such a scenario, would surely only be a precursor to liquidation for Sevco. Our attention should then turn to the continuing failure of the mass media to engage with the Sevco fiasco, and the reaction of the footballing authorities.
    Sunday’s game quickly fell onto the editing floor at the BBC. No surprise there, but who exactly is to blame for failing to look at newsworthy incidents during that match? Whether it be sectarian chanting, or the strange conduct of an apparently impartial linesman? These are not joking matters. They are related instances of systematic bias, what the Macpherson inquiry into the murder of Stephen Lawrence famously called ‘institutionalised racism’. Does anyone really think that, if Sevco had won last Sunday, that the game would have vanished from the Scottish news by Monday?

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  14. Nice try by The Hun and The Daily Rectum to link our manager with Southampton. Four days after both papers favourite team where played of the park by the 10 men of celtic which we won 3-2 they link our manager with Southamptonkeep trying guys must try extremely harder . So our manager wins us the league gets us playing in the champions league and winning trebles is giving that up to manage a team fighting relegation .Oh the bennys newspapers they will do anything to try and upset our dominance. No doubt about it it has Level 5 tattoed all over it .

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  15. Just watched the presser again. What a easy ride he got from the media.
    Oh boy could he talk, and talk, and talk……… gibberish mostly.
    I see Herrera, remember him, claiming that Pena’s problem was not lack of fitness, nor his lifestyle, but his inability to understand Pedro because of language differences, Portoguese v Spanish.
    That being the case why is he now out in Mexico again working with someone with whom he needs an interpreter to communicate with?

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  16. It’s difficult to comprehend why and who hired Pedro in the first place.
    Legend has it that he mesmerised the selection committee on an interview carried out over Skype.
    We should know who these people are, really we should, credit where credit’s due!
    Already his coat in on a shuggly peg back in Mexico.
    A truly horrendous appointment as the new Mourinho quickly turned into Coco the clown but not nearly as funny.
    However due to the bigging up of the new manager by the local media he lasted much longer than he should have and any league challenge was gone before he was.
    We should be grateful to the media for aiding and abetting the longevity of his reign.
    In many ways Murty has received the same soft treatment from the media during his metamorphis from developing kids to first team manager.
    No doubt there has been improvement but surely that was a given no matter who succeed Pedro.
    If a cup defeat follows the weekend result his easy ride in the press will be old news.
    I doubt if Boyata will be in the team at Hampden which will mean a much calmer back division and hopefully not having to twice come from behind. If the Champions score first then they should go on to claim a place in the final and take a step closer to historic back to back trebles.
    By the time the game comes along the likes of Roberts,Armstrong, Commper, and Griffiths will all have some game time under their belts and will provide a stern test for Murty’s charges.
    Also between now and then King’s wee issue with TOP/COS will have come to a head and the outcome is unlikely to bring anything other than bad news to the front pages with much more likelihood of the news reporters telling it like it is unlike their sports reporting colleagues who take their lead from a 3rd party.

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    • You are optimistic in thinking that any negative news around the sevco or Dodgy Daves finances will actually make it to front pages!

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  17. Phil, loving your work and keep on going with your insightful posts. Particularly liked the one on the “Real Rangers Man” wanting his money back from the “Glib and Shameless One” to be rebuffed by “Good Luck.” Where’s Liam Neeson when you need him eh?

    Anyway as I posted recently what’s the odds of Admin and the Newco after he split in the league? The 15 Points deduction then mean nothing and the “Deal” has already been approved by our incorruptible SFA according to local sources.

    As for our “Shame” by lack of Government in addressing the recent “Illegal Marches, Continual Sectarian Singing, Sectarian and physical attacks on Celtic players and lack of Objective Reporting by our Free and Independent Press” I think “wee Nicola” is out on her erchie at the next elections. Too much “Brexit” and not enough Government for most people, especially in Glasgow (now a dump) and Greater Lanarkshire. Developing Story

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    • Wee Nicola is gonna save Scotland, I don’t get it…. a Scot standing up for Scots and you don’t like her, baffles me…

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    • What a lot of nonsense.
      Glasgow now a dump…was it a pristine paradise before SNP recently took control and have spent the time since trying to evaluate the scorched earth left behind by Labour including Fair Pay settlements for women employees?
      Nicola voted monst influential woman in UK and SNP still 17 points clear in the polls after sucha long long time in office.

      Maybe you should be finding correct targets, ie The Police on the scene at recent march rather than a blinkered view.

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  18. The tactical movement of glasswork on his desk in that presser was priceless.
    Funnier than Jabba hauling the “Magic Hat Mark” out of his doomed presser.

    The gift that……………………….

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  19. Over on follow follow a benny was feeling sorry Ken Dodd sorry wee murty about his interview after the game on Sunday. Little did the benny know that the look on wee murts face was because he just got a severe telling off and put down from king or one of his stoogies that’s why he looked the way he did . Ah you can’t go wrong with loyalty at ibrox oh sorry they don’t do that it’s royalty .

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  20. The man is a legend!

    Phil, do you know what the status is regarding both Pedro and the magic hat regarding the paying up of contracts?

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